I’m adding this post to my Life Skills category here on the blog because I really feel that problem-solving is something we all need to be able to do, after all, do you know anyone who never has any sort of problem?
no, me neither.
Whether it’s a business problem or a problem in any area of your life. I hope you’ll find these tips helpful.
Be a problem solver – Focus on the solution
We all know someone (maybe you are that someone) who always talks about the problem. What these people do is they instantly share the problem and put it on someone else’s shoulder. NOT OKAY!
Did you ever read the book One Minute Manager Meets Monkey? Dumping monkeys (problems) on other people’s shoulders is not a good idea. Look it up, it’s a really good book.
Of course, it is a good thing to share a problem with someone for support, especially if you need emotional support to deal with a problem but it’s not okay to just dish out problems, passing them on to other people.
You don’t always have to know how to solve a problem but I encourage you to take a minute before you start spreading the problem to focus on a solution.
AFFIRMATION – I’m a solutions-orientated person.
Work on shifting your focus
Honestly, I think the human race is naturally programmed to focus on the problem but from a law of attraction point of view, whatever you focus your attention on is what you start to attract to you.
Now, there is a little more to that story but what I can tell you is this – When you focus your attention on the problem, you add energy to it and that can, in turn, either make the problem bigger or create more problems.
Shift your attention to finding a solution “What’s the solution to this problem?” or “How can I solve this problem?” your subconscious mind will dig deep and start to find a solution and the law of attraction will start to draw in a solution.
Ask for help where you need it
You won’t always be able to solve a problem on your own, that’s absolutely fine, for example, if I had a problem with something electrical in my home, the solution from my point of view would be to contact an electrician who could help solve the problem.
Also, there are problems that you just don’t know how to solve and you need to reach out to other people to ask for help and guidance, after all, there will always be someone who has more knowledge about certain things that you don’t have the answers to. Again, this is fine to reach out to others for help but let me offer some advice.
Don’t pass the problem on to someone else if at all possible. Maybe you can say to someone that you think can help “I have a problem, would you be able to help me solve the problem?” or “I have a problem and I think you may be able to give me some guidance on how I can solve it, can you spare me some time please?” This way, you value the person’s time and still own the problem but you’re asking for help to solve it.
My son is an adult now and very independent but sometimes things happen, where something goes wrong and he doesn’t know what to do. In this situation, I would want him to come to me and explain what has happened (the problem) and ask me or someone else for guidance.
I don’t need to fix the problem for him but I can guide him so that he learns problem-solving skills for himself.
Never assume other people can’t sort out a problem for themselves. If you’re asked for help, offer guidance but allow the person to learn and grow wherever possible by sorting the problem themselves.
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A very simple example of this I can share with you is from something that happened to me yesterday. I went to visit my niece in her new student accommodation. She told me that she’s been having problems with her showe not draining away and she didn’t know what to do. It was the weekend and she planned to speak to the maintenance team on Monday but wondered if there was anything she should do. I showed her how to clean the shower drain properly to clear it of hairs (eek) and what to do to keep it clean. She now has the knowledge and skill to stop this from becoming a problem in the future and knows if this doesn’t solve the problem she needs to ask the maintenance people to take a look.
***
In business, if I need advice from someone, I clearly explain the problem and ask “Are you able to help with this?” I’m constantly learning new skills for problem-solving in my business.
If you are a business owner, or manager (in charge of a team), I do feel that if there is a problem, in this case, it would be fine to delegate the problem.
For example, A manager of a retail shop might say to the supervisor, there is a problem with the staff totas next week. Take a look at it and fill in the gaps. If you need support, come back to me. Yes, this was a problem but it doesn’t need to be dealt with by the manager on this occasion. Delegating tasks in this way helps others learn and grow. The supervisor also then knows that if they can’t work it out by themselves, they can return to their manager if needed. This is positive and supportive problem-solving.
Maybe you’re a business owner, it’s perfectly fine to say to your manager, there’s a problem with this order, can you sort it out, please?
In general though, if it’s your problem, take responsibility for it and FOCUS on the solution.
NOTE: Nobody (or rather nobody should) expects everyone to know everything. When my son was looking for a little part-time job whilst he was at college, I suggested somewhere to him and he said: “But I don’t know how to do that.” I explained that in any new job, people don’t expect you to know what to do and that is why you get training.
IMPORTANT: I repeat, if you need emotional support, always reach out to someone, this is a different thing altogether.
Tap out the stress talk
I’m going to talk to you about EFT – Emotional Freedom Techniques briefly as this is such an incredible technique and can really help with problem-solving. If you’re new to EFT, please read EFT – How to tap.
Often when there is a problem it comes along with stress talk. In our mind the problem is huge but when we tap on the stress talk, we calm the situation and remove the negative energy so that we see the problem for what it is. Problem-solving is so much easier with a clear mind.
As an EFT Master Practitioner, I’ve advised so many people to do this and it really does help to be able to see the problem clearly for what it really is. I use this technique regularly in my business.
EFT SCRIPT for Problem-solving
When you feel that you have a problem and it’s all you can focus on, use the set-up – (tapping the side of your hand) – I’m tapping to release the negative energy connected to this problem. Take a nice, deep breath in and slowly release. Repeat three times.
Then at each tapping point say “This problem”
Use the tapping points… Top of the head – forehead – eyebrow – side of the eye – under the eye – under the nose – under the mouth – collarbone – side of the hand.
2nd round – Set-up – I’m tapping for a solution to this problem. On the tapping points keep saying “This problem”
3rd round – This is an affirmation and EFT combo – on all points say “I easily find solutions to problems”
Watch your self-talk
Be careful that your self-talk is not making the problem bigger than it really is. Once a negative thought pattern starts, it can quickly spiral so that a really small and simple problem becomes really big. You may have heard the phrase, you’re making a mountain out of a molehill.
If you spot that your self-talk is not helping the situation, swap it for positive self-talk, affirmations that do support you. such as…
- I easily solve problems
- When I have a problem, I keep a clear head so that I can easily work out what to do
- I’m really solutions orientated
Reframe the problem
I love reframing and it creates a powerful mindset shift. I wrote a post recently about starting over after a failed business.
In the post, I encourage readers to reframe the past. Instead of thinking of the past business as a failed business, reframe it (put a different frame around it) and see it as a wonderful learning experience. So instead of thinking ‘I failed in that business.’ you can say ‘I learned so much from that experience.
Take the problem and ask yourself “How can I view this problem differently?” or “What can I learn from this?”
It’s all about shifting your focus so that you add positive energy to the situation rather than negative energy that will block you and cause more problems.
Be careful not to take on other people’s problems
I feel very fortunate to have worked for amazing bosses in my early years of adulthood. I was in charge of a small team of people and one of the best lessons I learned was that I must not take on the team’s problems.
If I did, I ended up with a whole load of problems and got totally bogged down in sorting them rather than focusing on the work I was supposed to be doing.
When you take the problem from someone, you take away the opportunity for them to learn and grow.
You can totally offer support whether that’s in business or any other area of life. Just let the other person take responsibility for the problem.
This is really important for parents to understand. Let your child solve their own problem. Guide them and support them where appropriate but don’t take over (unless they are in real danger).
Whoops, I went off on a tangent there for a minute, back to my story.
At that time in my own career, I was given a book that I still think is one of the very best books I’ve ever read. It’s called One Minute Manager Meets The Monkey. It’s available on Amazon. If you haven’t read it, I highly recommend it even if you’re not a manager as it applies to all areas of life.
It taught me how to not take on other people’s monkeys (problems).
Time for some practical problem-solving tips
- What is the problem exactly? Stay calm and see the problem for what it is without adding drama or stress talk
- What action do I need to take?
- Is there anyone that I need to inform? For example, if you’re at work and notice something is broken, you do need to inform your team leader, manager, or boss.
- Do I need to ask anyone for help/advice? Remember though, if it’s your problem, keep responsibility for it rather than passing it to another person.
- What can I learn from the problem?
- Do I need to follow up at all?
Hypnosis Downloads
If you still feel like you’re not that great at problem-solving, I encourage you to check out Hypnosis Downloads.
Please note that this is my referral link and I will receive a commission if you buy from the site. I love this company and use them myself. The download I encourage you to check out is Creative Problem-Solving
Set for life with problem-solving skills
I really hope you’ve found this post helpful. Good problem-solving skills help you in all areas of life, whether it’s at school/college, in your business, in the workplace, as a parent, as a motorist, managing your finances, in relationships…
This is a skill you’ll be pleased you worked on as you go through life.
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Wendy
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Coach Wendy – Wendy Tomlinson Coaching
Lincolnshire, UK
Mindset Coach
Life Skills Coach
EFT Master Practitioner
Law of Attraction Practitioner
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